Zuck, I want you to explain to this irrationally angry woman that this coupon from four years ago has expired.

Could have stopped at 8008, but calculated too close to the sun.

Okay guys, how do we pass our restaurant’s health inspection?

Crest beef jerky! Experience the minty flavors of the…fuckin Southwest. Yeehaw!

Whatcha doin with that landmine?
“Uhhhh…cartoon mischief?”
Well okay then. Welcome to Disneyland.

Yes quite. Any time an adventure has the potential to come up, Gandalf hits that pipe and forgets to show up to the meeting.

I’m hoping for a ten movie series focused solely on Gandalf smoking the finest weed in the Southfarthing.

Have you been given jewelry that had some wackadoodle magical properties? Call the law offices of Gandalf and Gandalf and don’t settle for less than you deserve!

Ladybug DOOM music intensifies

I pictured a seal opening a beer and in a deep voice says, “Damn. Nice place cat. Mind if I stretch out on your couch!?”

Ey this’ll get ya arrested in Boston.

Yup! You can make custom camos, custom decals, place crew members (in beta version), and fight in custom battles or missions. Some communities even have fun competitions.

“It exploded. The hot pocket exploded.”

He’s delusional. Hot pockets don’t explode.

RAWR -Your favorite Dino bros maybe.

Gaslighting doesn’t exist and you’re going crazy. /s

Awww look, he wants to launch the missile!

Hey man. I could totally use that for…some lemonade I could maybe make maybe.

Poor captain. The light is no longer burning inside him, but defiantly he stands.

I shall introduce a law allowing gruel in the workhouse to be replaced with watered down sawdust.

Weekend at Chase Manhattan.

Shield toad.

I can’t believe they took out that makeover montage set to “Girls Just Want To Have Fun.”

Oh hell yeah. (T-Rex sounds)

Dog: Oh do you fellows also have yachts?

Bro, do you even LEAP!?

Derek needs to be on the sandwich offender list.

Worm 1: Something is walking up there, but in a nerdy way.

Worm 2: Nu-uh!!! Everyone knows our prey strolls casually around…or is a giant machine.

Worm 1: Didn’t one of the humans ride you around like a go cart?

Worm 2: Oh so you ALWAYS need to bring it up.

Dear IRS,

How are you? I am well. I paid my tax already when I bought gum at the Gas N Go, and it was 78 cents.

Your pal,
saltnotsugar

This is new console…Fun Barrel. For 20 liters of kerosene, you can play all night if the coolant doesn’t ignight.

Havin BBQ in the backyard,
Bombin Iraq in my heart,
Ate too many beans,
Now it’s time to fart.

Bless the great smoking trout. Bless the smoke rings from his great maw. Soon we shall join him at the Gas N’ Go in the sky, and take our own ciggies for glory.

This information is most welcome.

…say sike right now.

And the people came out of the city of Jerusalem, and beheld a bunny laying eggs of many colors. Many were confused, for the eggs were then hidden, within them, candies from leading brands. Hippitus Hoppitus.

Should have used a jet pack to get to flat heaven. Could have ended up in flat hell.

We’ve been getting complaints about your lack of drinking at work. We’re not in the Prussian aristocracy Ben, now take a couple of shots and get out there and make financial decisions for the company!

I bet woodpeckers have cool internal DOOM music playing when they go nuts on a tree.

This whole town is a donut, just waiting to get…munched.

Guys! Look at this great prop I found in my sister’s nightstand!

Fries are placed on the plate.
(Laugh track)
Ketchup is poured on the plate.
(Laugh track)
Plate explodes.
(Laugh track with applause)